As you may or may not have been aware, the Church of Satan planned to unveil their statue of Baphomet yesterday in Detroit. The Church of Satan commissioned the statue as a compliment to the Ten Commandments monument in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.
The Oklahoma Supreme Court eventually determined that the Ten Commandments statue violated the constitutional provision against establishing a state religion and barred all religious monuments from state grounds. The Church of Satan then changed the location of the unveiling to Detroit, where the church has a permanent conclave.
The Church of Satan needed to change the location of the unveiling once more when their venue canceled their contract after receiving threats that protesters would burn down their establishment.
In the end the Church of Satan established a four step security protocol for the event which required all attendees to sign the following before learning where the event would be held:
I agree that by signing this document under any name, given or adopted, actual or pseudonymous, I am hereby avowing my soul to Satan (aka Abbadon, aka Lucifer, aka Beelzebub, aka The Antichrist). I do so knowing that He (aka The Fallen One, aka The Father of Lies) or any of His representatives may choose to collect my eternal soul at any time, with or without notice. I understand that my signature or mark representing any name, real or made up, upon these papers constitutes a lasting and eternal contract, and that there will be no further negotiations on the matter of my eternal soul.
Now that the statue has been unveiled, the Church of Satan intends to gift it to Little Rock, Arkansas. A state capitol which also has a Ten Commandments monument, and one where the State Supreme Court determined that religious monuments do not violate the constitutional ban on the establishment of religion so long as the monument is paid for by private funds.
If you’re expecting me to reveal that this story is also a hoax, you are mistaken. The Church of Satan is real, the statue of Baphomet is real, their reason for building it is real, and the soul-contract is real.
Whether or not such a paper could actually impact the disposition of your immortal soul I leave entirely to your discretion as reader – but the entire scenario would fit nicely into an In Nomine campaign.